I'm enjoying all this G-crap. But we all know what really happened... Well, if you didn't, here is the real story.
SJS commissioner Garrison and SJS former commissioner Saco were together celebrating the running clock victory of Folsom over Oceanside. They are sitting together in Garrison's den drinking the last of their beers.
Garrison says to Saco, "Man, that was a great move on your part to get rid of Open. That way Folsom didn't have to get destroyed by DLS this year"
Saco replied, "I don't know Mike. I really think Folsom could have beat DLS this year."
Garrison stared at the floor for a moment before slowly shaking his head. " You really think so, Pete?'
"Pretty sure," replied Saco.
"Hmm - well, lets not worry about that now. At least everyone thinks Folsom is the best HS team in nation for the last 20 years or so." Garrison settled back into his seat with a satisfied grin.
About that time, Mrs Garrison poked her head around the corner. She had a concerned look on her face. "Mikey dear. You left the television on in the living room. "
"Yes honey muffin. We were planning to come back in there in a moment to watch those two loser teams play tonight."
"DLS and Centennial - that's the Open division teams playing tonight, right?" asked Mrs. Garrison.
"Ya got it, Muffin! But I don't get it. You don't care much about Football - you never have. You don't go to the Folsom practices and refuse to go to the Folsom games with me. So how do you even know who is playing tonight?"
"I'm sorry Mikey, you are right. you're always right. But while cleaning the kitchen, I happened to see a game on the TV. The two teams were playing the game so fast, I wasn't even sure it was football. I'm sorry Mikey, but I had to turn up the volume. The announcers said that they had never seen HS football teams play the game so fast - and - and - well a lot things like that. Then Mikey, I heard one of the announcers say it was De La Salle and Corona Centennial.
Garrison and Saco looked at each other with mild confusion. Finally Saco broke the silence. "Well maybe your sweet pea is just mistaken. Lets go back in there and take a look."
For the next two hours, both men sat watching the game with horror. Garrison stared at the TV with glassy eyes. Saco had been noticeably crying earlier, but now he just held his head in his hand. His nose wouldn't stop running.
Shaking his head as if to clear his thoughts, Saco suddenly sat up straight. His eyes brightened. "Hey man," he said a little too loudly, "we need to call CIF President Thompkins. He'll know just what to do."
"Good idea," replied Garrison as he moved his eyes from the TV screen for the first time in an hour.
CIF President Thompkins answered on the first ring. "Hello" came the booming voice.
"Hey Reggie, its Pete."
"Oh, hi Pete. Are you watching the DLS CC game?" Thompkins asked excitedly. "I've never seen anything like these two teams."
Yeah, well..." Saco paused a second to clear his throat. "Ahh-hmmm... That's why I calling you. We were absolutely sure Folsom was the best team in the nation by a long shot. But now... " Saco stifled a sob and continued hesitantly. "Reggie, we need your help. Hundred of thousands of people are seeing these teams play and now they know the truth. Folsom is no where the as good as these two teams."
"Not so fast," boomed Thompkins. "First of all, never ever admit that, even though it is true."
"OK - but," Saco glance over at Garrison, "But what do we do, Reggie?"
"I was getting to that," boomed Thompkins. "Second, you know stupid rule you pushed for so hard - that Folsom rule."
"yeah?" replied Saco meekly.
"You have to spin it hard the other way. Let's say it was the Pac-5 rule," said Thompkins.
Saco's eyes cleared a bit. He put hand over the phone's voice mic and said to Garrison, "Thompkins thinks my Folsom rule was a really good idea, but because of this DLS game he thinks we should temporarily call it the Pac-5 rule. You good with that?"
Garrison nodded agreement. he said, "Or we could even call it the DLS rule."
"I wasn't finished." Thompkins yelled in the phone. "Listen up! Use what ever means it takes to make all of this stuff seem like DLS' fault. Tell everyone that DLS was scared of Folsom. That they are dodging a game or something like that. And that they are a private school - a religious one no less - make it sound really bad!!! Oh, and throw in some of the recruiting nonsense. That they are abusing Centennial, a poor public school, by scoring two extra points. Dang, I was so sure CC could have scored at least three more touchdowns at the end if only DLS wasn't so unsportsmanlike by keeping their starting defenders in the game. Hmmm... Anyway, spin it hard."
"OK, got it," said Saco. "Anything else?"
"Yeah, there is something else," boomed Thompkins. Get someone the job right away - AND I MEAN RIGHT NOW - posting non stop on NorCalPreps, spinning all this crap. Got it?"
"Got it," smiled Saco as he hung up.
"Hey Mike," Saco said to Garrison, "Do you know anyone that can spin our angle non stop on NorCalPreps?"
"Actually I do," said Garrison. "I have perfect person. He's shy a couple bricks of a full load if you know what I mean, but he'll say and do what we ask of him. His handle is G61."
Fictitious characters have been replaced with real names. No animals or plants were harmed in the making of this story. Real human egos may have been inadvertently bruised.